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I have been extremely remiss in
updating this site, and I am sorry. Blah Blah Blah pnuemonia, and school,
and work and blah blah blah....
but, updates should be regular from
here on out, I swear. Thank you for your
patience.
Sincerely,
The management.
Spam Haiku
The lonelyest
time
Girls kissing in bars beside me
Come home to
nothing.
Replica handbags
Strewn accross fifth avenue
Who
cares if it hurts?
Louis Vuitton now
Gives greater pleasure
than sex
For the right woman.
We used to be so good together,
I
gave you the best years of my life
Croydon haziness dazzled
Fish
jumping out of the water,
An earthquake that killed my heart
Who
cares if it hurts?
embark in the dewy chronograph of
heterostructure,
acerbic in monies ...
Write me back,
please?
I must have told my man a hundred
times a day
I'm a lady with a plan
I got a mission,
I am here to
stay
Because of him there is hope -
Ash-colored...
hogging the
calliope ...
somewhat by a nightdress in tachinid arccosine,
With
trust.
Breath, again,
Remain Blessed.
Wanted: Dresser
Taken: cane for
the blind.
Wanted: DVD player
Taken: 4 bags of baby clothes, well
used.
Wanted: spare chess pieces
Taken: NSYNC Bobble
Heads
Wanted: a slutty housewife
Taken from behind
Wanted:
Child's bookcase
Taken: little girl's hair accessories
Offer:
Graduate Education books
Promised: dinette set, four chairs, and a
buffet
Offer: a laptop
Promised: 2 sticks of Ram
Offer yourself
a new way to be happy
Promised that slut the reaming she
wants
Offer: desk and chair
Promised: red fox cape and hat
Offer
to change
Promised to hurt
Wanted a way out
Taken an overdose.
Your beautiful when you are
angry
You f*cking bitch.
Lucky for you when I slap a bitch in
the face
She comes back for more.
You heard me,
She comes back
for more.
I gave her a rolex and now I do what I want.
You heard
me,
A Swiss Watch is all a girl needs.
Oh! Your dusty
thighs and
breasts
several striped pilgrims tents
could not contain
your
lustful heart.
I'll buy the beer if you do me -
my man is
working late.
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I get a lot of spam .... probably 400 emails a day of spam, and that is
with spam filtering fully activated. I can't help it - I have several
email addresses, and I have had them a long time, and as everyone always
tells me, spam email is a fact of life.
It got so that I missed the 'real' email in my inbox - the emails from
friends and family, and from people who had visited this site, because
they got lost among the Viagra and Cialis ads, the porn spam, and the
letters from Nairobi businessmen, eager to send me 21 million dollars. I
started to feel sick every time I opened my email client, because the
sheer time it takes to delete all of the spam every day is overwhelming.
I started feeling a little angry every time I sat down to my computer.
I had to do something.
This site is that something. I write poetry, using only the subject
lines of the hundreds of pieces of spam that I receive every day. A little
bit Found Art, a little bit Whimsy, and mostly, just to find a way for me
to find a peaceful intersection between digital communication and my
life.
As always, you are free to email me, but due to the volume of email
that this site generates (which is NOT spam!) I am unable to respond
personally to everyone. However, I do read all of the comments left on the
site, and truly appreciate what you all have to say.
This site has been featured in Newsweek, BBC News, The Boston Globe,
The Hindustan Times, The Fort Wayne Sentinal, Media Life Magazine, The
Philadelphia Enquirer, and a number of online outlets.
Thanks for reading,
Kristin
Spam Poetry
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